This interview is part of PT’s “Black voices in physics” series of Q&As with Black physicists.
“I can’t breathe.” Those words were photoshopped off Carl Fields’s T-shirt in a press release put out by Michigan State University earlier this year. The doctored image accompanied an announcement that Fields, an MSU student, had been awarded the Price Prize from the Ohio State University, given to a graduate student “whose work in cosmology or astrophysics shows exceptional promise.” Fields is finishing his PhD on massive stars and core-collapse supernovae and is looking for a postdoctoral position. He is originally from Phoenix and earned undergraduate degrees in physics and Earth and space exploration from Arizona State University.
PT: Why did you go into physics?
FIELDS: In high school I took physics to avoid having to take chemistry. The instructor was awesome; he employed active learning. I decided to pursue physics in college, and I planned to get a job in aeronautical engineering. There are a lot of jobs in that area in Phoenix, so it seemed like a good path.
In college I got connected with a professor who was simulating stars, and I loved it. When I found out that graduate school was an option for those interested in research and would not cost me, I transitioned from planning to get a job to going to grad school.
PT: What is the topic of your PhD?
FIELDS: My work focuses on computational simulations of massive stars and their explosions. The explosion of a massive star has a crucial impact on many different areas of astronomy. Using simulations we can bridge connections between astrophysical observations and theory.
PT: Have you faced barriers in physics because you are Black?
FIELDS: Yes. Nothing unique. One of my mentors—a white male—said there are a lot of physics departments like ours at MSU, meaning that the wider field has stuff that makes it harder for people of color. When he said that, it reaffirmed my efforts toward actively looking to change the field and make the environment more welcoming.
I realized how important community is for my success. I had friends, and I am thankful for my friends and for my adviser. But being around people who look like you is inherently different. I was starting to see that some of my needs were not being met.
PT: What would help?
FIELDS: One thing I do is post my application essays online. This is small, but people write me and say it is helpful. At Arizona State University, I’m participating in an IDEAs team—the American Physical Society’s Inclusion, Diversity, and Equity Alliance initiative—that is identifying ways to increase diversity.
There are new postdoc-to-faculty fellowships. But I worry that they amount to two-year interviews. And even if the person is hired to a faculty position, the network may not be there.
What I’d like to see are departmental changes that accommodate students and bring cohorts together. Removing the qualifying exam would be good—these exams can serve as barriers. Don’t even get me started on the GRE. On my first attempt, I scored in the bottom 9th percentile; on my second I was in the bottom 13th percentile. The physics GRE almost kept me out of graduate school.
Black students are asked to do additional labor—to sit on panels about diversity. That is work, it takes time, and we should be paid for it. It’s great when allies step in, and they should be paid too.
I try to work hard to help where I can. There are a lot of average physicists who are not Black. If you are Black, love physics, and are not exceptional, you should still be able to be in the field.
PT: You were recognized this year for your graduate work. What happened with the doctoring of your photo?
FIELDS: My adviser asked if I wanted MSU to do a press release on the prize, and I said sure. I sent the press office a handful of photos. They chose one from 2018 and altered it without my permission. That was upsetting.
In the photo I was wearing a T-shirt that says, “I can’t breathe.” The T-shirt was famously worn by athletes like LeBron James and was made after Eric Garner was put into a chokehold and killed by the hands of a New York City police officer. Those words were some of his last. The shirt has a lot of significance to me, and the text has a lot of implications. Wearing it is a sign of protest. Removing the text is erasing part of me.
I told the press office to either use the original photo or take down the press release. They wrote back that they didn’t mean harm and didn’t mean to diminish the value of the wording. But they didn’t say why they had removed the text. They fixed it.
